It's all anniversaries at the moment. Five years ago today my mother died. All those months of hospital appointments, hospice visits, arrangements for carers, nurses...all the conversations on the phone. All the times I cursed my own ill health for obstructing me from visiting, supporting as much as I wanted and needed to...and the suddenly it was all over. She had gone. I'd done my best and now it was time to tidy up. put things in order, say goodbye and move forward.
I'm not sad today...just recognising a passing. My mother spent much of her life in ill health but she always got back up and moved forward. She was gentle and kind. I give thanks that I was blessed with such loving parents. Being an only child makes you closer still and my mother was an 'only' too. Now she's gone there is no Cusp family from before...only the one here now --- me, my partner and our two children. I see my mother in my daughter...her eyes, her shyness, her sense of humour, her creativity and I know that, whatever the truth about life, death, God that we all live on in our children and our children's children.
5 comments:
This is poignant, Cusp. Have a gentle day. x
This is poignant, Cusp. Have a gentle day. x
The only child of an only child: there is something plangently poetic in this.
It seems your mum died a few weeks before my dad. It is a gift to be able to look back with love.
I like what Signs said in her comment. So I will just say "ditto"!
This brought a tear to my eye. My mom died almost ten years ago, but I still get waves of sadness and longing and, of course, love for her. My mom spent many, many years with ill health and I had a tough time being there for her as much as I wanted because of my health. I know that she was able to talk with me more than any other family member and I'm thankful for that connection. I just wasn't able to support her that much in a physical way.
It's good to stop and remember. It's good to see those who have passed still in our lives in so many ways.
Hugs to you.
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